yellowbug says:

I don't especially love being vulnerable on here. I've lived in Lubbock for 31 of my 33 years. Inevitably, someone will read this whom I don't want to have a window into my feelings, but the hope that someone will be encouraged by this is greater than that fear. Loneliness is the single greatest thing I have struggled with post-divorce. Which is an oxymoron to me because I'm the one that filed for divorce. But just because I initiated the process doesn't make me immune to all the feelings/emotions that come with it. In fact, I think it's the enemy that tries to lie to me and convince me that I shouldn't be feeling certain things because this was my doing in the first place. Whew, I could go on with that one thought, but I'm gonna try to stay on topic. I've always enjoyed alone time. Even when young, I remember chilling in my room reading, singing, or watching tv solo. Growing up with a large family, it's easy to find someone to fill the sil...

Oh, readers, I have missed you! Have you missed me?! You've probably lost sleep wondering where I've been and what I've been up to and how my beautiful babies are doing...jk. I post everything on FB! What can I say, I have a following of people who love to look at gorgeous children! Since my last post chronicling the birth of my Alice Every, a LOT has changed. I have actually gotten a divorce and am now a single Momma. *Disclaimer: This blog does not exist to bash my ex. He is an excellent father, and we are amicable.* BUT this blog DOES exist to relay how incredible horrible and exhausting and distasteful dating is these days. It also exist to repeat witty quotes from my son, Jack, and to complain about how stupid hard it is to be a single Momma. If you don't like complaining and bashing, this blog is not for you. Ha! No, it won't all be negative, but I'm going to be as real as I can without naming names or ruining lives. I used to tell my ex I was SO glad ...

Today is September 9th. Not an especially unique day. Nothing to set it apart from the rest. Except it is special and unique to me. Today is my daughter's 6-month birthday. Even that doesn't sound too special until you realize how very close she was to not being with us. Life and busyness has kept me from writing up her birth story, but since I have some time here in Canada on our extended summer vaca, I'm going to collect what I remember. This is a loooong recounting of her story, but it's really more for my benefit than yours. If you brave this reading, thank you, but if you don't, I won't hold it against you! I had another good pregnancy. I hadn't gained as much weight as I did with Jack, so I felt good. I had done Pilates until week 30 and walked after that. Sonograms, tests, heartbeat: everything looked good. Ever since I had first found out I was pregnant again, I looked forward to the labor/delivery part. I know that sounds weird, but my epidura...

Going Home It was 2:15 on Wednesday, January 28th, 2015. The sun was shining, I was wearing flip-flops, and running errands for work. It was the last day of work before Matt forced me to take off. The induction was set for Friday and by the way thngs were looking,  Jack was not coming out on his own. While I had really hoped I would go into labor on my own,  all my walking, bouncing, pineapple eating, salsa-chugging efforts were going nowhere. This was to be the first deviation from my birth plan. I'm on 19th St. and decide Cinnabon sounds amazing. And so does Schlotsky's! So, I make a detour to grab lunch. As I walk out, I think to myself, "I wonder what would happen if my water broke right here in front of all these people." But that wouldn't happen because only 8% of womens' water breaks on its own. The movies have led us astray yet again!! So, I'm opening the door to my car and there is a release within me. While ...